Beauty and the Beast
Beauty and the Beast

Episode 69 · 3 months ago

Beauty and the Beast Show Episode 69 - Our 69th Show!!!!


Beauty and the Beast Show Episode 69 - Our 69th Show!!!!   

Welcome back to the Beauty and the Beast 69th Show!!!   

Intro w/ Beauty Bitch Slap Insurance from the Ballsack Agency The Beast Parts Failed Nation presents Every Band Naked Tour Queef Acres: Lisa’s Hot Tub Stream Burger King Commercial Betty in Blunderland Rat Bastard Theatre presents Three Horny Rats Closing w/ Beauty: Sixty-Nine, Sixty-Nine Song Follow Us: Website: our Store: 

Listen to Us: iTunes | Spotify | SounderFm | iHeart Radio | Amazon Music

A simple boo. B B B B B B B B B B B B B B B B y. The white zone is for loading and unloading. Only if you need the loader unload, use the white zone. M H of the B B B B B B B B B B B B B B B B B B B B B B B B B B h.

...m HM, coming to you almost live from lakeside. Yeah, hello everyone, welcome back to another episode of the beauty and the beat show. Can you believe it? It's our sixty nine episode. Who? Sixty nine for everyone? Holy Crap, did you see the preview show? Go Watch my interview with the amazing Alca Celia. Alright, amazing sixty nine jokes in there, but we've got a lot more sixty nine jokes coming up. Hell, yeah, we have an incredible show. I can't even tell you how much stuff is on there, but be prepared because it is definitely a sixty nine blowout. Yes, we finally made the sixty nine. Thank you all for tuning in and sticking with us. Man, yes, I'm Christine Nolton on beauty. I don't think I introduced that yet, but what the hell, I was so excited just to say sixty nine. So, without further ADO, here's beauty and the B show, episode number sixty nine. It has been called the slap herd round the world, but Chris Rock didn't mind. What's his secret? Is it his comedy career, his celebrity status, his sixty million dollars? What's Chris Scott, that you haven't got bitch slap insurance from the BALLSACK agency, providing insurance against unprovoked bitch slab since nineteen for as little as you're entitled to compensation if you are the victim of a bitch slap? Joined the many celebrities who don't give a ship if they get hit. Bitch lab insurance from the ball stacking agency, an official sponsor. Oh, beauty to be shocked. If you're hone and you've got the time, call a beauty on the spluge line. You can talk about the sixty nine and she's read. They're gonna blow your mind. You'RE gonna love beauty's freak show. You can use your Cai shap or that mole and you'll heap it on a splu se line. You can't talk about the sixty nine, oh, you'll keep read it on a splue slide because her spouge is working over the time on it. Honey, spluge, there's no sub chick. That's...

...too taboo, and she'll spleue sholl over you. You might even get to see her cans if you check her out on only things. Beauty is here to take you fine, leaving nice deposited, but your job. Oh, you keep read on the splu se line and you can't talk about the sixty nine. Yeah, you heat read on the slush line because her spoils she's working up for a time on it. One slue. You shouldn't beat around the Bush, because she hasn't got one on her couch. If you'll come and do the party late, she's gonna Spank you with her license plate. If you want to take the test, get in line like all the rest. You're heating it on the SPLUSH line. You can't talk about the sisting night. Yeah, your heat read on the blush line because her spouch she is working over time. Honey, honey and spruce called beauty. On the SPLUSH line. She accepts cash, apple and Venmo and check out her only fans. Tell them beasts and chill. Failed Nation concerts presents every band is naked tour, sponsored by Golden Heart, Rock, Super Casino and Marina. Bands. You love bands, you hate bands. You've never even heard of before. completely naked. This tour really house balls, tits and asses too. You'll see things you've never seen before and will never want to see again. Overweight rock legends and our EXIC singer Songwriters, muscle bound metal bands and lots and lots of female bass players. Every band is naked tour. It's interactive, it's coming soon, it's possibly illegal. Every band is naked sore from failed nation concerts. Rock out with your cock out for real at the every band is naked your exclusively at Golden Heart Rock, Super Casino and Marina.

There's nothing like the smell of freshly tilled soil in the morning, AH, the call of the morning bird, the smell of honeysuckle and skunk. There aren't any skunks around here. Good morning, Mr Douglas. I'm must say it's a mighty fine morning for some waking bake. Mr Heeney, do you smell of skunk and say what are you doing here anyway? Just checking on your crops. I mean my crops, I mean the crops and I must say, the white widow is coming in mighty fine this year. In the blueberry cush looks especially tasty. White Widow Blueberry cush are you calling marijuana on my property? Technically, these fine plants are not on your property, as they are exactly forty three inches from the edge of your property, and that technically makes some squatters. I demand you move these plants immediately, now. Now, it's not by hasty, Mr Douglas. After all, Wan and Hector here put their hearts and souls into these little babies, lovingly grown from seeds that their cousins sent them, all the white from Mexico's eating your cheery, well, hello wine, hell, Hello Hector. I was just going back to the house for some breakfast. cheezing your cheery, well, you have a matter if I'm breakfast, Mr Douglas, and no, try to contact the FEDERALIS. Alright, boys, time for some of that old fashioned righteous trimming. Well, Lisa, Lisa, where are you here? I am Oliver. Now what's going on here, Lisa? Where did all the wires come from? and A hot tub? Yes, Olivera, isn't it marvelous? Ed got it all hooked up for me he's so helpful. Is that Acchini you're wearing? Well, my fans are expecting at least three bikini changes today and I have been working on my tent. Darling, the hot tub stream already has a very loyal following. Hot Tub Stream. What the heck is a hot tub stream? It's on a television station called twitch, and I'm streaming my life in a bikini, in a hot tub, and the boys in Germany just love me. I didn't even know we had an Internet connection. Oh, Darling, EPP was so nice put it all...

...together for me, and he is an absolute genius when it comes to electronics. He's here now, dear, with the present I bought you with the money I made on the hot sub stream, well a little of it anyway. I have to think about my retirement. Hey, there, Mr Douglas, Hey Mrs Douglas, or should I say hot mama sixty nine at twitch DOT TV? Ye, Huh, Oh, Hello V did you bring Mr Douglass present? Well, I sure did. Here you go, Mr Douglas, the keys to your new Tesla. Tesla. What's going on here, oh darling, we are making bits hand over fists, whatever that means. It's Tesla's hot tubs streams marijuana. What a day. What a day. Speaking of marijuana, Hey, have y'all tried any of that? There Blueberry cush it's my y tasty bud. Well, I do hear the white widow is especially good this year. It must be what the doctor ordered. Mm Hmmm, mm hmmm, mm hmmm, mm hmmm. For what has a man? What has he got? If he's got Burger King, then he's got a lot. Just pile it up high with pickles and good a large order of fries, and should be to be do. The number one thing that I've got to say is having your you're away. The number one thing but I've got to say, is having your boy. Thank you everyone. Your night. God bless you. My people told the L that's a lot of do that. All that later your way, having your baby, having your B and now the continuing adventures up belly in Blunderland. Public Domain is...

...the name of the name, folks. We've been passed by the National Board of Review. No fucking way. Betty, glued on a sweet dress for the occasion, I found you think us the bony back his foot. That baby talk makes me wild. That was supposed to be my line. Yeah, I can sleep afore I get some tale to its head. Rabbit head, rabbit head. Oh, anyone wants is some head, Darling. Geez, if only getting head was that easy. Bed. Oh my fucking God, it's alive. Wait just to drink, just the DREN. Calm down, beauty, this ship has only just begun. Can you imagine how much blow we could do? All Fat Mirror doing some window pane, actual window pane? Whoa, that outfit is hot for cartoon. You mean the subway station by the Spooky Tree? That's why I used to buy pot, you two. The subway licked her bottom. She's a French maid. It's her dry air carter builds, and now some upskirt action. Imagine what's on her only fans, is this a cartoon or my wet dream in sanity, Jam, my favorite? Well, oh good, things must come to an end. This is so true to the original story. It's amazing. Shrink, Ola Cola, that ship gets. You fuck up the guys at Dank, but his gredit is good. He's actually a shrinky dink. Since when did your cat get a bartender GIG? fucking cat is holding out on me. He was a tan and now he's a two. That guy was never a ten. Everyone else guzzles and betty uses a straw. At least she swallows. You thought you were going to see a tiny, naked betty, you perv dude. Mushroom musial team, my favorite. Holy Shit, three doses.

Please report any unattended hat. Oh, creepy lady, possibly Russ from Google, freak turtle things, silly wabbit Tweetl eduts, monkey face, Unicorn heads and on that day, the Lord's top hat dopspit for the good people of Blunder then and from then on it was called the Lord's top hat day. Ah. Yes, Betty's contractual singing obligation is even inforsable in other worlds and dreamstates. Smokes and edibles. Everyone over does it. In blunderland, you really should wait a little while to see if the first one works. The gambling problem called winning hundred Gambler, big dog versus chicken dragging. Sure be sure? We should get to the cartoon Gang Bang Part any minute now, folks, I think it's a different cartoon. Sam Hammer and the clantones my favorite. Those fucker's can jam. Oh those poor fish. I can't watch the dangers of math. I think this is the result of alcohol overdosing on Facebook, more like it. She's dancing at Jake with a toilet on her head. Now that's talent, folks. Betty does it better, but hubbub, hubbub. Oh my fucking God, what's happening? The mushroom tea is finally quicking the water. Someone should have plugged the hole in. God, Stop Hat Holy Shit, it's a mark, suckerbar he's definitely going to harsh everyone's buzz. Sure, take betty, he'll leave the other freaks behind. Yeah, I'M gonna get some seal delivered nuclear power to lobster tags. Let's stop at that. Diggos a topic. Hey, come back here with our mate. She still needs to clean our bathrooms. Bombs away, fuckers. Let's stop at that. Diggos a topic. Why the Hell didn't the turtle go first instead of sucking around with lobsters? The lobsters have a strong union. Oh No, they're going to the flower, the poor guy.

Well, x marks the spot, but I'm not sure if it's the A one. Haven't you heard of consent? Your barbarians coumming around the dire turn. It's lucified now a boarding spirit airlines. Well, yes, that's spirit airlines for you. No, no, horror, horror, where ten plucks you will meet. We're all gonna be a lot thinner and just like that's the mushroom to you were off, saving us a costly trip to the emergency really can we pump her stomach anyway? That's all, folks. Hello everyone, welcome back to another episode of Rat Bastard Theater. I'm Christine Norton. I'll be your host tonight's story. We have three horny rats. Yes, that's correct, three horny rats. Are We ready, folks? I'm just here for the cleavage. If you haven't guessed it by now, I'm having trouble controlling my rat, but that's okay, I found the g spot on the rat. We are good. Three horny rats. James, so twitch and Carl were three rats that lived among a pile of rocks, and they had very huge cocks. James and Sir twitch were small rats with small penises with rather small balls, but Carl was hung like a horse. His cock was long, his teeth were big and his feet were also big that sometimes he accidentally stepped on his cock ouch. He always had to be careful. Then watch out, jeames search, which would shout, get off my cock, Carl often cried. Actually, that was get your cock off of me, Carl often cried. When there's cock involved, you never know how the story is going to go. It was hard finding Poutang in the winter. Snow covered the ground and it was cold in the highlands of Scotland. Wait, when did we get to Scotland? What the fuck? Anyway, all the locks and paws froze over with a thick layer of ice. I know...'re expecting another cock, but here we go. I'm so horny, Sir twitch complained. We've had nothing to bang for days. Like my cock is erect all the time. I'm horny to James Wine. Carl, why don't you go find us some rat pussy? You are much bigger than we are and it's easier for you to find things. Your eyes are bigger and you can see better, not to mention your huge rap cock. I might be bigger, but that only means that a cat can find me easier. Carl replied. Be careful then, motherfucker. Just hit them with your big Cock and show them your huge balls. So twitched then giggled, as rats often giggle. That's funny, said Carl. Okay, I'll go and look for some Pooche, but don't be surprised if I don't come back. If we're Horny, so are the cats. This isn't going to be pretty. So Carl left the rocks and plowed through the snow. His feet were so big that he often tripped on them, as well as his ginormous cock. Because where are we going with the story? I'm freezing, he said, rubbing his arms and his cock to keep the blood flowing. Yeah, there's a lot of cock in this fucking story. Who wrote the ship? He walked and walked and walked some more. As soon came Abon Oh, he soon came upon a sweet piece of rat ass. Now and says, loving like rat ass everyone. Yep, she was sitting off by herself near the woods. Carl saw the smoke coming out of the chimney. I'll bet they have food in there, which was also coode for Pussy. He sniffed the air. Yep, smells like Pussy to me. Yummy. He crept closer and closer and closer, always on the watch for a hungry or warning cat. In this story they can go both ways. It's all good if your cat doing a rat, that's none of my business. All right. So there was a door. It opened by and a woman came outside. She definitely came, all right. She picked up a few pieces of wood. There's that wood again. She picked up a few pieces of wood for the fire. Then went back in. How's my chance, Carl said, and darted...

...into the cabinet. The door shut right behind him. He hid behind an old couch. It was warm in there, almost as warm as some nice rat pussy. He was enjoying the heat once again, rubbing his arms in this cock. Yes, his cock was returning to fully erect. I think I'll have a look. He carefully peeked from behind the couch. There's the fireplace. That's another couch. You know what I think this rat bastard was looking into a mirror. But what's that sitting on a couch? Nice? It's a cat, and Carl coulpen hidden. He wasn't too much for that rat on cat stuff yet. Don't worry, he'll get there after a while. His boner grew bigger. He thought of his friends twitch and James I don't know why he would think about those rons while he was jacking in anyway, he knew that they must be given Hornier than he was. I've got to get some rat snatch. I've just got to get some rat snatch. I had to say rat snatch twice because, frankly, I enjoyed that line. He peeked again and saw that the cat was sleeping. Slowly, he crept from behind the couch, as mice fucking do, and headed towards the kitchen. After all, if there are no rat holes to fill, Swiss cheese would definitely do. I mean, if I had a physical Dick, I would probably fucked Swiss cheese too. But no, there was a kettle of barley suit bubbling away just like that. He thought, Yumy, not as goes rat pussy. But what the hell are you got to eat? Right he spotted a plate piled high with hot sausage rolls. That smells so delicious, Oh and flaky fucking biscuits. I you get my energy up, especially if there will be an orgy later, and I can sense an orgy because rats can smell orgies. He licked his little ratlets, he licked his little rat lips shut up. Seeing that no one was around, Carl crept up on the table and began nibbling on the sausage and biscuits even more and more. It's like Shrike, shrike. It's all right, it's all right, it's an other kitchen table, shouted a rather plump lady. Hey, dude, more qushing for the pushing man. I don't know about you, but I know I can't suck a spaghetti. Wait, I can't fuck it, I can't suck a poll okay, the wait. No, I'll fucking onto the story. All right, more qushing for the pushing. All right, fluffy, come catch the rat. She called her cat fluffy. Typical fucking Catney. Carl gulped in terror. He was frozen in fear. Big Orange Cat and moved towards him. Yikes, he grabbed his cock and his...

...biscuits and just started jacking it like it was his final moments on earth. Oh my God, he jacked himself all the way across the living room. He jacked himself all the way behind the couch. You know, Fluffy chased him, tried to catch him. Then the front door flew open and Bam, Carl was out into the snow once again, but fluffy was right there too, right so carl found a haystack and crawled inside and the COT pounced to him round. It was a kind of sexy cry, you know, talk about getting some rat on cat action. Like where's the rat? Fluffy wondered. That wasn't sexy. I don't know what the hell that was. I just wanted to tell him where a sweet orgy was going to go down. And now that we are liberated and being kinky with rats, just gonna grab my Chesticle Rooklyay, this is getting fucking hot here. Karl overheard what the cat instead stay in the haste hate hay stack. What fun. That's called the HAY staff. For Hours, the cat pays back and forth waiting for him to come out. We knew he was definitely doing a lot to come and let's put that way. When the sun set that night, fluffy was called back into the House for the night. Well, until the Orgy, of course, you have to sneak out with for those you know. You can't have cat on rat on human like that would be fucking sick. But all right. Well, it was almost time for the big cat and rat orgy filled with lots of sixty nine and oh yeah, cats and rat sixty nine and yeah. When the door shut behind him, Karl came out Hay Stack, and boy did he come. Oh my God, was so good. But he was like now, what? Now? What do I tell Sir Twitching James? He thought about what Fuffy had said about the orgy and ran home through this three freezing snow I've got to get them back to the orgy for the Little Red Cox, Ratt Cox, where have you been, sir twitch as? We thought you had been eaten by a cat or a Fox. James said, what did the fucking Fox come into this? Let's go back to cat. We thought you'd be eaten by a cat, James said. It's like I nearly was Carlson. He told his friends what had happened and that there's a big old orgy that's about to happen out the barn with cats and rats, where cats and rats just come together. I don't know who's going to clean up that comb it's sure as Hellype for me. That's good enough for me, James said, me too, sear twitch added. The three of rats went to the barn, where they sixty nine.

Throughout the night, everyone ate and no one went hungry. And this has been rat bastard theater. That was an amazing sixty nine episode, wasn't it? Holy Crap. What comes after the sixty nine show? A lot of clean up, that's for damn sure. Holy Crap. No, but we have one more song for you here, called sixty nine. Sixty nine. You might recognize it as at Ol waste from the sound of music. Sixy nine, sexy nine. Every morning you hate me small and why? Hey, that's profiling right there. Queen Bright, you look happy. You eat me for some most blush. May you glue them flow bloom man foe, faver say see six Cy Dne, bless my mattress farver. foresome most blush may you blue mean flow bloom man foe for Saxe Dye, Saxty Dye, bless my mattress for ver. I'm Christinaton and you have been watching the beauty and the beast show. Yes, US up on the weather. Dovey W W dove Gideons B show dot com.

In-Stream Audio Search


Search across all episodes within this podcast

Episodes (73)