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Beauty and the Beast
Beauty and the Beast

Episode · 1 year ago

Beauty and the Beast S2:E5 - The 420 Special featuring PJ Keen

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

Beauty and the Beast S2:E5 - The 420 Special featuring PJ Keen

Check out PJ Keen
https://www.facebook.com/pjkeenisfunny

https://www.instagram.com/therealpjkeen/

Show Schedule
'Twas the Day of 420
Blammo
Beast 420 Special
The Charles Manson Family Christmas Album
Beauty's Bits with PJ Keen
KISS We Still Have Mortgages Tour
PSA From the Jersey Shore
Marijuana Song (Camp Granada Parody)
Harry and Harriett's/Gorilla Goo

Find Us:
www.beautyandthebeastshow.com
www.rampantlyla.com

iTunes | Spotify | SounderFm

Coming to you almost live from lakeside. Money was short. Times are hard. Here's your fucking for Twenties Day card. Twas the day of four hundred and twenty and all through the house everyone was smoky, even the mouse. Mom At the Horror House and dad smacking ass got it. Love being spanked. I had just settled down for some Nice weet, I call grass. Out on the lawn I heard such a clatter I spring from my piece to see what was the matter. Out on the lawn I saw some chronic shape like a dick. I knew in a minute it was my deal in, a named Nick. He filled all our stockings with some weed and some beer and a big rubber Dick for my brother. The queen year he rows up the chimney with a thunderous fart. My dealer blue the entire chimney apart. He swore he cursed had a mouth like a trucker. Here's something we all get. Stone motherfuckers. Happy Four hundred and twenty. Beauty and the beast show would like to thank their new sponsors, llamo. That's right, Glamo, creators of such Classic Board Games as don't pick your scabs and don't Jack off in Daddy's hat introduce their latest creation. Don't shit the bed. Don't shit the bed is family fun for everyone, and everyone gets the clean up after. To spin this spinner and travel around incontinence land in our race against the clock, you'll laugh so hard you'll shit yourself. Just don't shit the bed. Now available at most major retail chains except for Walmart, Camart, target and Kroger. Thanks, Blamo. Hey, greetings and welcome to the beast portion of the show. I'm beast and today's topic is four hundred and twenty. That's right, it's for hundred and twenty, and frankly, I don't know what the buzz is all about. Let's face it, we're all addicted to something. Frogs love Crocaine and chickens take a lot of ecstasy, but ducks are the worst of them. All, those fucking quackheads. People should not take drugs away from me, specifically cops and airport security. It isn't my fault I'm tripping all day and he's worn out shoes I'm wearing. They must be laced with something. But seriously, if you've never tried smoking marijuana, four hundred and twenty is not the day. To start, you should just do it all the other days of the year, used for twenty as a day of sober reflection and somber boredom, and leave your high expectations at home. Con Job Records presents the childs Manson family Christmas album, recently transferred from cassette and remastered for the masses. The childs Manson family Christmas album as all your favorite classics, including death to all the Christmas pigs, the twelve days of L S D Christmas and the holiday version of helter skelter. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll mostly cry and then you'll cry some more.

For the childs Manson family Christmas album, exclusively from con job records. Geoffrey Dahmer gave it twenty stars out of five and serial killer magazine says it's six hundred sixty six percent classic. Pick up your copy today at all kymark cut out pins and in finer gas stations across the try state area. Up Next it's beauty spits with PJ keen. Hello and welcome to beauty and the beast. This is a little show that we like to call beauties bits. That's with the bee. If you want to see the tea. You have to join my only fans. That's to night. We have an amazing person coming at you so like he's been all over the Internet and Lord you, you have to Google him. He's awesome. His name is PJ keen and we are so happy to have you here. Thank you. I appreciate all the kind words, but I mean probably don't Google me too hard, don't take too deep. But Um, okay, a little bit about myself. I was a chattoo artist before doing comedy. Let's say what I did, and then I lost the use of my right eye and after that I just couldn't see the point anymore. People always ask like how much does it hurt? How much the tattoos hurt? And honestly, I think this job causes more pain than my last one. Like yeah, tattoos heard, but her. Have you ever set sat through one of the PJ's like ten minute drunk zoom shows so hard without laughter? I'm doing my best. I'm trying not to sound robotic. I'm where people find out I'm a comic, though. Most of them just asked me to tell him a joke, like yeah, I don't work for free enough. Why not so I started off with what do you do for a living? And like I build houses. I'm like, okay, cool. So I know you have like a hammer and nails and wood or like land to build a house on, but if you build me a house right now, I'll make fun of it. Look for sure, I don't know if you can tell by my face still, what I have. Like, if you're up on real rare diseases, I have what's called Bell's policy. If you aren't about familiar with it, it gives you stroke face, but it leaves don't like the brain damage. It's literally all vandy vanity. So really it's like diet stroke. It's got all that stroke flavor. Mine is the street cred this sympathy, the super convenient parking spots that come from having a regular stroke, or like a stroke classic. But I mean it's not. It's not stroke zero. It's just fucks up your face a bit, diets stroke. So that's it's a little bit about me. I've been trying to learn a lot. I'm trying to learn from my mistakes and I haven't. I've been learning a lot from my mistakes and, for example, I make a lot of them. And now I've learned that. Let's just say it's just like me counting my mistakes. They don't bring the conclusions. Has Much worse consequences when you have severe depression. Sometimes that one false flat. Here are some thoughts in mine. All right, my bad. So that last one TMI. Some of them were good, though. Some of them were definitely good, but let's stick with jokes. Um,...

...so kids are working fucks up great, like. It's hard. It's hard to tell you. It's like kids being kids, or IFASE, you know, like psychological damage imparted. It's like my one year old does this thing where each dinner and then puts his fingers down his throat afterwards and throws up, which is probably just what like weird kids stuff, right, but that afterwards he looks up at you and he smiles like really creepily. And so, just like calculating the therapy bills, like what did I fucking do to this kid? Let's which change topics. Yet I'm not the type to knock on wood, but this morning I got the splinter of a lifetime and I am ready to talk so much shit. Fuck your would fuck your wood in the ASS. would knocked boom. This is gonna he's gonna say it's gonna show my age, but I you know those pants and say juicy across your ass. Those are like this generations version of those bumb equipment sweatshirts, and everyone had one in the s. You do they stay? Sharing is Karen, but the only thing Karen shared is her opinions on facebook like coach acks. She's probably commenting on this right now. I I'm in a group chat with like a German girl Scottish guy. Daily reminder that every other country speaks better English than America, for sure, but you know where. I got into comedy on purpose, you know what I mean. One of the perks being a male comic is getting to me so many female comics and then hearing about all the musicians they want to fuck. So anyway, I'm I'm married. Marriage is like a sport. We're like everyone is on the same team, in the opposing team at the same time. Like, for example, whatever money I make is hers just like whatever money she makes. No, actually, it's not a good example. It's like this, like I buy video games and bouncy castles and shit with money. She does boring stuff with it, like feed the kids. But my wife and I still use protection right. We sleep with like a whole arsenal by the bed, you know, for like Roberts and stuff, which is exactly what I tell her. The truth is I sleep with weapons on my side of the bed because she's a crazy redhead and I'm really good at pushing her buttons and with that. I know I took out way too much time, but thank you. Thank you. You're well, that was funny. That was really, really funny. Thank you. That was funny. That's exactly funny. I do. I enjoy yourself that this, I really do. It's like, I'm night. We have not caught a mic together and like so darn long. Oh my gosh, long, absolutely long it has. It has been too long. It's like I know you were doing like a lot of outdoor open Mike's and I love voutdoor a Mike because it's cold out here in Massachusetts. So like when you get on stage and you sweat, if you're outside like that totally takes care of that. So you just look cool as a cuke like the whole time. But yeah, I'll do all the the mikes all...

...winter. Nice. Nice, sure, that is awesome. So how did you get in the comedy? So I always wanted to, like I always it was. It was on my bow okay list. But since I was fifteen I had this this dream of being a tattoo artist. Like he got a tattoo when I was fifteen and I was like this is it, this is what I want to do. The Guy who did my first tattoo did horrible. He was an he was a he had no bedside manner, and then afterwards he like I paid him and it was so expensive and I didn't know because I was fifteen. He's like what no tip. So like that was his. That was just kind of vibe. Is like a big bike, you dude, and I was like no, no, tip, tip, tippic. But I was like okay, if that guy can do that and I can draw, I garry. He's just made like, you know, a hundred and fifteen an hour. Like well, fuck, I can do that. Scroll the People to say you can't make a living with art, you know. So I was like that's what I'm going to do. So made that happen. Answer like fifteen years later, it's going good and then I get I got bit by a tick and got lime disease which, if you don't realize it and you don't notice, like the bulls eye mark, like it just goes away and comes back and goes away and comes back and just autoimmune attacks you. One of the things does it sags after your face, and so I wore an eye patch. Well, I was dealing like well, I was Tassooing, I was trying to tat you like one eyed and then, which is it's difficult. It's very difficult. But I didn't realize that I was supposed to be taping my eyeshot to so, like, basically, I was wearing an IPADG and not blinking for like a month. And Yeah, the technical term is it dried out. So it's like it's not black, like I can see out of this eye, but it's I can't read numbers or anything. So I was getting headaches trying to tattoo. So I was all right, Kinda. You know what? Now I got a pretty fucked up store. Very was gonna stay tell it and I started writing it like long before I go on to stage. I started writing in two thousand and nineteen and then my first show, my first stage, was in January. I believe the sixth, I want to say, and then I did a bunch of those and then corns and then I've only done one since then, but it's just I would do more. It's just been a matter of logistics exactly. It's like, oh my gosh, yeah, hyme disease and diet stroke. That's like that's like a two for one right there. It's like, WOW's at double. That's a double women. That's why amy right there. That's that's that's almost like comedy gold. But if I, if I, you know what, if I can laugh at that, there's nothing I can like. No, heckler could just be like you're ugly. So you drude. I know, like what do you got on? I don't like any other information, you know, slops funny. You're too obvious to be funny. Shot up like yeah, I'm just it was I was always I was always afraid of it. I had stage right and I watched Gary Gulman's the Great Depression and I saw that somebody with I've always had social anxiety, depression, those kind of things. Somebody showed their true side of like he gets on stage and seems so confident and he gets off stage and he's so not, he's so himself, and I was like, Oh, so, you don't have to be like a super, super confident...

...person, you just have to get up there and try it till you get better. And that was the kick in the butt I needed to to get up there. And once I go out there, I was like this is I can't cut you get that first laugh and you're done. You can't do anything else. You know. I know. It's like, oh my gosh, like I'm missing like the stage, like completely, like I missed the audience. I'm I mean the zoom shows are great, but the live audience was always the best. A practice. Yes, yes, this is fun. Thing you can do is zoom, but it's not. I preferst I after doing zoom, I'm more comfortable on a stage, like I feel nervous before a zoom show for some reason, because it's weird. It's weird, like you did. Natural reaction of the audience is to laugh quietly to themselves like Oh, cute, he like the when I want to hear laughter. And that's how I know, like okay, I should tag this and keep going, go, but you can't. It's harder to connect, is it's yeah, yes, it's like I was just doing a show over at the wench and I swear I went like laughter deaf, like I know that there was laughter, but I couldn't hear it, like it was like the weirdest thing, but then I stopped. I mean maybe there was a little lag, you know, on the internet or whatever, but it's like I did eventually hear it. All right, yes, yes, but then it's like I remember, though, a lot of times when I was doing shows and everything, I always recorded every show that I did because when I was up on stage and I was still my thing, I went laughter death, like I couldn't hear it until I watched the video back and I was like, Oh my God, they really love that are you know, they love me. They really love me. They like except for, except for the one guy that almost had asthma attack. I was like it's a good thing that we're like down the street from the hospital. Get know, hey, if you give someone an asthma attack, that's one of the wind column and you know what, then you can go and revive them and and that you're a good Samaritan. So that's a double when ney to like I bring the heat and I fixed the heat. It's like we got it, we got a purpose. All we do. We do so I noticed a little side behind you. The the hot breath you want to see about hurts. Or is it forwards? I can't tell because my screen, Marlor, is forward. Yeah, it's okay, hot breath, and then I can't read the last word because I'm blind. Before I had it forwards and backwards for when I'm her her. Yeah, I got got to show them out. I got it. I can't. I can't knock because I'm a heavy. Heavy its hot breath and it's just the best community in at least all nine right now. But also like we're out on stages to just the jobs I've gotten, the friends I've met, like I know someone in every city that would let me crash on their couch and do like to do a show. It's just the networking of ability that you have with them and it's just the only rule is, like be positive. So if you like people start like trolling, they're kicked out. So it's just we're family, very nice, very nice. I do. I like the hot breath community. They're great. I haven't dug fully into it yet, but it's like I've been around it and I'm like, you know what, Damn, I've got to get in there, I've having get yeah, let's get you going. If you're ever up tend in the morning, would you wait tend? That's the best time shoot the shit with everybody, because it's yeah, we write for ten minutes on a random word and make a joke, but also we interact with, you know, like eighty to ninety comic day and we just bust each other's balls. And Joel Byers is the one that hosts it and a lot of times he'll give hosting duties to some of us if we want it, and it's a blast, man. It's really like a fun time. We got through...

...that, we got through this quarantine. Hop Breaths got me through the quarantine. You know, yes, yes, it's like. That is, you know, what I want to hear. Like, you know, it's like everybody's all like the press and slump. There's no shows, there's no this, there's no that. It's like, Dude, just look at the Internet. Look there's like a million things going on. You know, it's like, whether you a musician a comedian, there is something out there for you. It's like a amazing, like I love it. I Love Joel buyers is like I remember meeting him back at Hollow Week for rampantly and we all got in with it. He's Joelie tall eventually of the same height. Oh my God, that's like sits in mine. So that's why I don't sixty three over all, six three. It's amazing, like I'd be like this little troll that comes along. But Anyway, I remember meeting him and like he's with the rampantly group and we are just like tossing shit and breaking his balls left and right, and I was like, I don't think he was expecting that, but he can take it. Yeah, absolutely, he's done. He does it. He started with a podcast. Well, he's a standup com he's been a stand up for ten years. He is a special I'll show it out to trokesy husband, and it's very good. His sarcasm runs very dry and it's nice. It's like what I might I was raised on, but he he all the train of thoughts totally leaving the station. Yeah, all right, continue on to the next thing, because I totally lost that one. Dead are. It's all good. Sometimes that are could be great, but as a comedian. It's not not during one's in there. Like you can deal with some dead are on the stage, but like if you've or get your thought, you got to like make fun the fact you for God to thought exactly and slide. You know. Oh, no, I know where I was going to see. Yeah, he's gonna shoot the shift for a little bit. So it comes back. He has a podcast and it's starting to gain some weight. He's had, you know, like Never Gatsy, he's had Jerry Corley on there. He's had yet foxworthy, he's had just name them. He's had them. Like he's interviewed Mark Norman like six times and he's just he's really good at asking questions. Become to open up and that's one of the things that I that's where I found him. So like listening to those podcasts is really really was really helpful and that's what introduced me to him and then we started talking and then it was just like cool, hopper, US let's go. But he's just all the dude. He's just all the dude. He is, he is, he is. It's hard to look up for him as a mentor. Yes, yes, I said, I do like the right ten and I love, you know, the word of the day or whatever that comes out at zero am, and you're right, the joke and it's been getting me to write and more. I don't do it every day. I should do it. I should make myself do it when I see the word, I should just go for it, you know, even if it's a total flop, just to do it, just to get it out up there, you know, because sometimes it takes like, you know, a hundred things that are flops before you get to you know, and that's a good one. You know, hundreds of them. You know. Sometimes, you know, not every joke works and sometimes you need help with it. Like I believe that there's a structure. Like every joke can work, you know, it just it's like it's sometimes it's different with your delivery, like a good yo could just work, but maybe you're just not delivering it correctly, or so you know. It's like the little things. Maybe it's not meant for your voice, maybe it's you know, I've given jokes to people like anytime somebody like I'll give feedback on jokes a little bit online. Put my biggest piece of feedback...

...is try it on stage and record yourself like that's it. Like there's no better feedback than try it. Like when people say is this funny, it's like, I don't know, it's where. It might be funny as words on paper, but like until you get up there and you tell it, you an audience, do they laugh? And then you they don't, and then you try rearrange if you like. You rearrange the words until you get kind of a chuckle. Then you rearrange the words until people are like that and then you feel that magic moment. Yeah, real a quick while. I'm the something what you brought up. Yeah, I was one of the one of my hot breath brother Crin. His name is Joe. She's so who's also a phenomenal comic. He taught me the even if you don't write and every day take one of your jokes in your set and just like write it, grab piece paper and write it down, and then she's obsess about it all day. One joke. Don't like obsess about your set, thinking nothing else, just that joke, and then just like is this funny? Is this funny? If Thee Change It, word it, reward it as and things, take some things off tag it. If, at the end of the day. You still like it, keep it, but like just committed to memory and just work on one joke a day, which is so underwhelming. Like it's it's overwhelming to like work on a whole set, but if you just say one one of the day, your your your sets going to be fucking phenomenal. Yes, I don't know if you can have my kid right in the background, that white he's got him. He's there on the other side of house. You got to get Ya. No, I know. I have two cats. I'm sorry, it's that. Don't be sorry. I've got two fur babies. I treat them like they're my kids. So that I'm actually I've actually have like a whole five minute bit where I'm talking about you know, it's like being a mom is like totally great and everything, and I ramble on about it and it's pretty much a comparison with cats and kids. But it's like people don't know until I get to mention you know, they're so great. You know, it's like when they come, when then they come in your arms and they smell it with you and then they start purring. It's like, Oh, D mention that. My forget to mention that. My cats were my kids. If I like that, mrrect that's good. And like kiddies and kids is so close. There's something there too. Definitely I like that. I like that premise. I like all your jokes. I watch every time I watch you. I think we both want them. We final in the Big Blue Ball last time I did it, I believe. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I think that. I think the big blue ball is coming around again. That's always coming around. Yeah, but yeah, it's wrong. It throwing on down the road. I love it and you know, thank you for that. With the jokes, and I'm working on, I guess, a little bit more cleaner material, like not too much. I got to sorry to interrupt start the beginning of my sentence, interrupted the middle of yours, but this isn't a clean show, is it? Like you're gonna have to know me out. Okay, thank God. I also didn't know. This is okay, thank fucking Christ, because I do not. I can't. I tried because I'm a big fan of Apregatsy and and Gary Galman and and they have like clean material, and so I tried to write clean but when I just get off on a tangent and be myself, I curse like a fucking kid from Boston. You know what I mean, like we we talked out of you. I know we do. I once my first time on stage doing comedy. Now I've been doing theater my whole life. I I've done Improv for over twenty years. So getting up on stage it doesn't bother me all.

So I get up there, I start doing my spiel and I ask people in the audience, and actual audience, you know, is there anyone here that's uncircumcised? And I swear the host of this show like lost her shit. She was like, I was ready to put the stuff on facebook live until I heard the words that were coming out of your mouth. She's like, I didn't know you knew so many dirty words. Oh my God. That happened to me on a stage halfway through a joke. It was like the tension about it was a racial thing and I let the tension build a little jo much, and then the host, you just came in like you that was pj and I was just like, dude, it's not. Now I look like it was just like how my kids starting to learn words, and so, like the first thing we use a little tape recorder so like you to watch we say. So like the first thing my house, obviously to go was the n word, and like that's where I let the tension build. And it's like nap, NAP is the word. Like we can't say nap without him throwing a riot. So it's our protesting or something. And but I let the tension build. So I failed that night, but I know what you mean. I know what you mean when you're when you're people are like who, yeah, he quick get it. Yet it's a yeah, that's a that's a go home with your head down. She just let me run with it, though she didn't like she she heckled me to through it and everything. And then we've had a queue and a session after because some of the words that I was coming up with, you know, talking about like uncircumcised penises and you know like splooshing and all this other stuff. She's like I have some questions. I'm like, okay, let's do it, you know, let's expand my time a little bit more. Let's do you know what? Somebody, another another hotbroad person, not a jump. Just going to keep dropping names until you tell me to stop. She's like a newer comic your name is Tonya Cook and she has the best false naivety, like where she can jest, like tell a joke. Okay, I'm not going to give up any of her jokes, but like she's tell a joke and you you see the obviousness in where it's coming from, like the conversation she's having, and then you see it go over her head and it's Hilarious, absolutely hilarious, and she's starting to find her voice that way. So I was like super, I see a new comics learn something new. How long have you been doing comedy? Comedy, I believe for a few years now. Not, yeah, not in probably just get stand up. Yeah, just like three years. That year, yea, and years where you hit your stride. Definitely, HMM. It's like I'm just looking on building it and I'm glad that we got to meet and everything, and this is my gosh, this podcast has been so much fun to do today. This is awesome. Yeah, this is Um where you were? You located at? I'M IN NEW JERSEY. She's so you died with my buddy, Don know, my girl Ashley, go to moves and I think Kevin, I think Kevin Brady's down there there's a couple of comics from New Jersey that. So I'm going to be visiting Jersey as soon as this whole yes shit show is over. Me and Matt Monad have a have a tour plan. So we're going to hit like Mass Jersey, Connecticut, New York and and like New Hampshire. So hopefully, hopefully, we can get on a show to you. Yeah, that would be awesome. You know, it's like pick up, pick us all up and you know, it's like we'll do a man. Yeah, you know, it's like check out, these gonna rider tracolate, crack everybody in the bag like clown car. Exactly.

...that. That's what I was saying. It's like we all need to put in for like a tour bus and just like pick up everybody on the way and just have like this massive tour. Tour buses are so nice. They are like when you get on a tour bus you're just like, I don't deserve to be here. I've chattooed. I tattooed on tour buses, like I tattooed on the warp tour, on tour somebody's tour bus. I don't know if I'm like allowed to say who, but it's fancy. It is fancy pants. McGee, like a little house like one ABAGO. You gave me a Winnebago and I would just hit the road. As my dream is not I don't ever want to like I don't want to be famous, as scares the shit out of me. I don't even like recognized me in the grocery store. But I do want it. I do want to travel and see things and just do different crowds, because you don't know. It's like you're showing up to the same shows every week. You don't know people that are just laughing because they know you. So it's like I want to see if I'm actually funny. So I want to go where people maybe not my demographic or, you know, somebody that would find my stuff offensive, and I want to see where I get round it up, where I can like soften it up so it hits everyone. And look, that's all that's all I want, is just to travel and do calm and he yes, me too. I'm there with you on that dream. I I'm glad you so close. I thought you were in California. Very regulate from California. So I'm so excited. It's like I wish, it's like I like it out there. It's like there's less humidity and everything. I know they're they're everybody is like, well, you know what it's like. They have fires, they have this, they have that. It's like, well, you know what it's like. We're not all that safe in Jersey either. So you know, I think no matter where you go, there's going to be something you bring a California Person To, like Deep Jersey, like the City City Jersey, or like Boston, like the nave deal. Dude, I have a couple comics coming down this weekend. I have a like a little air BNB and like some booker from Seattle and a comic let girl, Danny d from Um Sacramento, hilarious, larious Danny Danny get, you know her. Yeah, and hanging out with there this weekend. That's too cool. This is all so cool, so excited, so excited and yeah, so like that. While I'm in Boston I'm going to show in the town nice. You know, she's doing a thing for Boston accent guys. So I'm just gonna unleash her on bought like the whole of Boston. Boston is not safe this week? NOPE, definitely not. Definitely not any more words before we wrap this podcast up. Let's let's land this plane. Have we fought? Listen. Okay, you can find me on twitter and Instagram at the real PJ keen and, as it like, on every platform, I'm universal, and then on based on Facebook, I'm just PJ keing. I have like a you know, one of those pages you can like but also be my friend, because I need I like friends, you know what I mean. So that's the only place you can find me, and I have some I have some zoom shows coming up. But who wants to promote zoom shows because, like, I feel bad making people even watch it because it's just't but yeah, no, we got it to are coming up real live tour soon, as soon as that vaccine. Awesome, awesome, although, Yep, it's like just follow the real pj keen and I will drop all the...

...links down below, of course, and we will hook everybody up then we and I would thank you for being here, Pja. It has been at awesome time, and I'm Christine. No, beauty and the beast, beauties bits. That's with a being, not with the tea. If you want to see these teas, you have to go to my only fans. Thank you, but I go like that was so much fun. Yeah, yeah, kiss us. The bends you love is back August nineteen at Golden Heart, rock casino and Marina. Kiss. We still have mortgages tour. Kiss in full makeup, because that's with new demay kiss playing their classic hits, because that's what you expect. Kiss, charging three times the normal ticket price, because we still have mortgage tour. Two Thousand and twenty one. Get tickets now at all failed nation outlets and coming two thousand and twenty two the kiss. We are robots or Kid August nineteen at Golden Heart Rock Casino and Marina Tea. A public service announcement from the Jersey Shore, who wants to let you know that now is not the time to visit. There are so many reasons not to visit the Jersey shore right now, including traffic. Yes, the traffics already a mess and the roads are filled with idiot drivers from Pennsylvania, New York and Delaware. Stay at home. Another great reason is just the time of year for the July's coming soon, so see you then. Don't forget it's that magic time of year when Spring has sprung, love is in the air and the seagulls are fucking. That's right, you can never unhear the sound of sea gulls having x, and the side of it could scar your kids for life. Seagull fucking season is usually over by the middle of by, so stay tuned for details. This is the Jersey shore saying. Don't be a shoeby stay at home, sponsored by your local hotels, restaurants and casinos, who remind you that they to meet your money. After all, the ocean is about three point eight billion years old. What's a few more weeks until you see it? Hello, mother, hello father. I've been smoking marijuana and looks good, but seems better. I'm sisted. I could hardly write this letter the whole rights literacy days. Man just text, cheese, leaves of green, some Meta balls. I'm in love with marijuana. Funds are good, but bounds are better. was that moves over there, wearing my green sweater, feeling reless, feeling great. I've been smoking Marijuanna. Get used to it. This is a theme going through the song here. This is good, but wheat is better. They're the same thing. I'm going to go make myself a double decker game. That was a lot of words. Getting munchiess feeling horny. I'm in love with little debby Swiss rolls. MASURMATION is a dream. Oh, I ended up with two kinds of dream. Yeah, I went there. Yeah, back to smoking. Eyes are clazing. I'm in love with marijuana. I like trying something new. There's a God damn stream based off of gorilla glue. That's right, it's called gg for go look it up. While we're on the subject. PSA Gorilla Gloom makes a terrible loop. Unless you love your lover that much to get stuck to them, don't use this lub anyway. I'll the fuck do I in the song. It's been going on now for...

...wait too long. Back the smoking, back to baking. I Love Smoking Marijuanna. My mom is mighty, mighty plenty. Let us all get together and celebrate for twenty. Oh Yeah, man, the song is done. The song is over. I'll keep smoking marijuana. Back a bull. Let's roll one side. That's all for me now, as I say good night, good night, special shout out and lots of love to our new sponsors, Harry Loves Harriett, the Jersey Shore, is leading sex shop. Harry Loves Harriet is well known for bringing you sex shop classes like they'll dose by donny officially license marble common cockranes and the all new rebel Phillips flow up doll. But wait, there's more. Harry loves Harriet is the only place that you can find beauty in the beast show products, including the all new gorilla goop. That's right, you heard it here first. The all new gorilla good and sets me and s go eat shit for gorilla goop. It's a gallon of the still monkey Jes, gathered with a patentent process that guarantees freshness and always, no gorillas were harmed in the harvest. But what are our wrists tired? When you want to do the nasty and you need a little loop, don't grab the Gorilla Glue. Get Yourself. Gorilla Goo now available at all Harry's and Harriet's wwww showcom.

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